-april 2nd-

my officer said :whats the point of marriage when you got the word divorce.
i guess he has seen it all. its alright for him to say that. anyway he is feeling more understanding talking to her when they are not "married" status now. he had a sad upbringing. i pity him. but he is strong. but he doesnt let it brood him. he does his job and pursues his passion. and his kids.

i guess its sad. ya im not really looking at marriage in my usual way le. but, i dunno. i would still love it. but will i have a chance. its not really up to me le. its up to 2 people. but lets leave this to .. 5 years down the road?

today you must have slept very late. wonder where were you. kbox till 5 am? i get no answer when i waiting at jp. 10 to 12. i just stupidly wait there. in hoping to see you. be it answer my sms or going to his house. i was thinking. and going crazy. should i wait there? or wait lakeside? or send to your house? your milk tea. i cant be at 3 places at a time. i went home at 12. dunno if you got to drink today. so where were you? at the temple? or at his house? i dunno. i having crazy thoughts. why hp off. why. i wont know cause i dont have a need to know [you would say that].

-im a small boy drowning in the big world of questions and uncertainty.-

do tell. i wish you would. and i hope my stupid thoughts aren't real. please. tc